One of my goals for this year is to complete the Map Of The Soul book, by Tricia Brennan. The purpose of the book is to help you discover your true purpose and to determine and remove the obstacles that hold you back from freedom and happiness. You work through different levels and I have completed Level 1 and part of Level 2. Level 1 focused on negative self talk and shifting your internal dialogue. As Tricia suggests, it takes discipline to stay awake and challenge your negative thoughts. So far this year, I've been extremely conscious of my thoughts (primarily because I felt I moved through so much of last year unconsciously and don't want that to be the case in 2012), and it has been a good thing for me. Its definitely a challenge to re-frame negative thoughts and to not drift into unconscious living, but I'm plugging away at it!
I'm currently reading Level 2 which is about redefining your self image. In this section it states that your subconscious communicates through the language of pictures and feelings. That's why its important you have a strong sense of the qualities you want to develop and a clear vision of the person you wish to become as a reference to build a dream on. I totally agree but, for me, this is the hard part. I have snippets of who and what I want to be, but I don't feel that I have a complete picture necessarily. Sitting down and getting quiet enough to create that image and those feelings each day also takes a lot of discipline, and I'm not as disciplined as I could be. The minute my brain gets an inkling of struggle or something feels a bit tough, my ego kicks in and convinces me to 'do it tomorrow', to 'wait until I feel like doing it' or to do it 'when I have the perfect answer in my head'. Of course these situations and scenarios never arise. So nothing happens, which means nothing in my life changes and the cycle continues!
Anyway.... despite the challenges I am persevering. I know a shift is required on my part and that it's time for me to create my reality through work and action (the only way anything really happens). So when the thought runs through my head to put off working through an exercise or completing a meditation I challenge myself to do it right then and there. I always end up being glad I did and nine times out of ten, the showing up, making the effort and just starting something is all you need to do for the rest to fall into place (even on the days I don't think anything worthy could possibly come out of my head, something always does). I'm looking forward to seeing how my thoughts, reality and hence life shifts as I work through the book. I'm under no illusion that it's going to be easy, but nothing worthwhile ever is, is it?
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